Characters Waiting to be Written

I have a lot of characters waiting to be written. Lots of ideas jotted down and I even have a handful of books I've started, but ended up pushing aside for others. The list is pretty endless as far as what's waiting for me to start working on next.

There's this true southern gentleman with a name I really love and a storyline, and he's waiting rather patiently for me to write his book. 

There's this girl named Chloe who is waiting for me to get the guts to try her story because it's unlike what I usually write. I will need lots of focus for her book and I don't currently have enough to give.

There's the two solo WIPs I keep going back and forth between.

There's a list of characters for my and Mary's books.

And then, there's the story I'm here to talk to you about today.

I've been wanting to write it for a while. I don't think about it a lot, but I do every blue moon. Lately, though, I've been thinking about it more than usual. I know why I have, but that's not something I'm going to get into. Like I said, I want to write it.

But I don't really.

I'm struggling with wanting to write it and not wanting to write it. What's the big deal with this story? That's what you're thinking, right? Why would I not want to write a book?

Because I'm scared. 

It's that simple. A portion of it would need to be carefully written a certain way, and that makes me nervous. The reason I thought of this idea is very personal, so that makes me nervous. And because of that, if I do write it, I know that I'll be even more obsessed with every last detail to make sure that the story is told perfectly. 

The story itself scares me.

Not because of anything bad, but because of my personal attachment to it. This won't be a true story, but there will be a lot of truth in it. 

So, here I am, thinking about this story, half way to obsessed already. But the fear has been holding me back. 

Until today.

I don't know when I'll finish this book or if I ever will finish it. However, I'm going to start writing. Thinking about it won't get me anywhere, so I'm going to pour my heart into this story in bits and pieces until it's either done or until I can't work on it anymore. I realized that all I need is progress. That's the only thing that will help. 

Not thinking about it for hours on end.

Not wondering if I'm good enough to tell this story.

Not my fear of writing it.

This may be the only time you'll even hear about this unwritten book, but I need to do something instead of thinking about doing something. That's my new plan with this particular idea. I'll start writing it and take it slow, and we'll see how it goes.